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02:07 pm: Hmm…maybe…

Eternally curious Rachel Griffin lives in the World of the Wise, hidden from the eyes of mundane modern earth. Arriving at Roanoke Academy for the Sorcerous Arts—a school for magic located in New York’s Hudson Highlands—she discovers a more secret world, the motives of which she had reason to distrust. Instead, Rachel puts her faith in those others fear: dark elves, demons, and junior Supervillains. The friendships she forges will save her world. Or, if she missteps, destroy it.

Originally posted to Welcome to Arhyalon. (link)

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From:oneminutemonkey
Date:May 15th, 2012 07:21 pm (UTC)
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Every time I see something with the name Roanoke, that doesn't actually involve Roanoke, Virginia, I get a little sadder inside.

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From:arhyalon
Date:May 15th, 2012 07:32 pm (UTC)
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This is actually the original island of Roanoke.

Only, in this alternate reality, the reason the British could not find their lost colony when they returned was that the sorcerers uprooted the island and sailed it away.

It sailed the oceans for several centuries before it was grounded in New York during a fight with a storm goblin.
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From:oneminutemonkey
Date:May 15th, 2012 07:35 pm (UTC)
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Okay, that does sound kind of interesting. :)
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From:arhyalon
Date:May 15th, 2012 07:47 pm (UTC)
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In my earliest notes, the island was still floating. Maybe it will again, someday. ;-)

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From:annafirtree
Date:May 15th, 2012 08:18 pm (UTC)
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I would go with "has reason to distrust" instead of "had", since everything else is in the present tense, and the switch seems odd... (how could she have had reason to distrust the motives of a world before she discovers it?). But I like the blurb.
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From:arhyalon
Date:May 15th, 2012 09:36 pm (UTC)
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Yeah, I eventually caught that. Now it reads:

Eternally curious Rachel lives in the World of the Wise, hidden from the eyes of mundane modern earth. Arriving at Roanoke Academy for the Sorcerous Arts—a school for magic located in New York’s Hudson Highlands—she discovers a more secret world, the motives of which she has reason to distrust. Following her heart, Rachel puts her faith in those others fear: dark elves, demons, and junior supervillains. The friendships she forges could save her world. Or, if she missteps, destroy it.

From:tapinger
Date:May 16th, 2012 01:58 pm (UTC)
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I would distrust a world's motives too, if it had any!

You didn't exactly ask for feedback this time, but "eternally" makes her sound like one of the undead. Living people generally admit the possibility of change.

This is becoming quite a smooth capsule summary, though it doesn't have as much of a hook for me as some of the ones you posted earlier. :)
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From:arhyalon
Date:May 16th, 2012 02:07 pm (UTC)
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Thanks. You are right about eternally. I had 'Supremely curious' before, maybe I should go back to that. ;-)

I think this or something like it will have to do. The problems with some of the earlier ones is that they don't really fit the first book. They are good descriptions of the series as a whole.
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